天鹅奏鸣曲吧 关注:84贴子:420
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【新人】想把天鹅翻译成英文,大家怎么看?

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第一次看天鹅奏明曲就感觉很像译文,还特地百度了一下。。
看完了之后,就觉得好想把它翻译成法文什么的,但是无奈法文太渣渣了,就打算试试英文,如果有错误,大家表打脸啊!!


1楼2015-01-31 02:17回复
    先把翻译了的那一段发上来~~
    Today is Saturday.
    It is dawn. A thick curtain of grey fog hovers above Paris,stopping the sunlight from penetrating through the gloomyclouds- it seems to weigh down heavily on everyone.
    I sit inside Maxine’s Café, a cup of coffee and a croissant placed in front of me, untouched. Like all of the otother ladies and gentlemen, I don’t have any appetite, instead, I gaze outside the window.
    This is the most tragic morning in Paris I’ve ever seen: no sweet scents of flowers, no warm sunlight, no delightful music, no laughter nor smiles, neither was the newspaper delivered to me on time, even the food wasstone cold. The waitresses in the corner worked slowly; distracted, some abandonedtheir work altogether and stared outside like the customers.
    Everything was still.
    After some time, a man wearing glasses walks hastily inside,his loud footsteps attract everyone’s attention. Yet he obviously doesn’t notice,he walks straight towards me, sweat dripping down his pale hollow-cheeked face,he whispers into my ear with a trembling voice:
    “… Sir… Paris…has fallen!”
    Yes, June 14th 1940, my mother land…fell!
    In May, the Germans swung around the non-existent Maginot defence line, and marched into the French territory. Two days ago, the angry growls of canons and the rapid fire of machine guns could be heard coming from outsideof Paris. Rumours began: France has failed completely? The Nazis are going to destroy Paris? Germans have already crossed the English Canal and are attacking London… this type of news circulated around the city, desperate citizens could only accept them. Industries stopped working, radios stopped emitting, newspapers stopped printing. The suspicions couldn’t be proved, thus after bouncing a fewtimes on the ancient walls and bricks, everything calmed down once more.Parisians awaited fate’s arrangement in numbed calmness.
    This morning the judgment has arrived, Germans swarmed into Paris like locusts.
    I feel the colour drain out of my face, I grab my hat and coat, then stood up abruptly: “Pierre, call a car, I need to go to theAcademy.”
    “But Sir, Sir,” my loyal secretary blocks me hastily, “the Germans are occupying the streets, it is very chaotic outside, it is better if you return to Amande Cottage.”
    “I need to see Marisa!”
    “Miss Giade must be very safe now” he pursues me anxiously out of the hall, “please listen to me, Sir- these roads are full of military vehicles, we can’t get through! Besides, Madam is really worried about you…”
    I take out a pen then briskly wrote a note:“call my mother, if the post office is still working, send her immediately this telegram. I will find Marisa first, then leave Paris as fast as possible.”
    I shove the paper into his hand before rushing out of thedoor.
    There aren’t many people on the street, the majority of them hiding on the sidewalk. Petrified old people and women watch, alarmed, as the motors of the Nazis troops whiz by, young people clench their fists, their eyes burning with anger. Most of the people hid at home, observing cautiously theevents occurring outside.
    The flags flap about in the wind, one by one they fly pastme. I pull the brim of my hat over my eyes, a few pedestrians brushed againstme, running quickly, desperate to get home, there was mayhem everywhere.


    2楼2015-01-31 02:24
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      加油!
      作为英语学渣,爱莫能助


      来自Android客户端3楼2015-01-31 11:49
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        花了半小时检查有没有字跑到下一行,怎么还这样!!求大神指点!!


        5楼2015-01-31 23:06
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          加油!顶!


          来自Android客户端14楼2015-02-06 07:18
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            加油!继续!英语渣


            IP属地:四川来自Android客户端16楼2015-03-19 10:15
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              看着挺有立体感的


              来自Android客户端17楼2015-04-08 11:23
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                但是我只认识26个英文字母


                来自Android客户端18楼2015-04-08 11:23
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                  好强


                  来自Android客户端19楼2015-04-24 13:48
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                    今天又翻了一段~ 希望有人帮忙挑错,名字翻译地好渣。。(掩面)
                    Marisa, Marisa, Marisa, you have to be safe! I shouldn't have left you alone in the academy, even if you insisted! Wait for me, Marisa, wait for me!
                    I thought whilst quickening my pace. At this moment, some shouts could be heard coming from the opposide pavement, a few pieces of glass were shattered at my feet.
                    Several student-looking young men were cursing and throwing rocks as wells as glass bottles at a German vehicle. A tall soldier carrying a machine gun jumped down, waving the muzzle about threatenly at them. This arouse the young men's anger, a boy with ash-blond hair even thrust his chest at it...
                    My God! Isn't he Joseph? My heart seems to beat twice as fast!
                    These silly boys, why don't they stay obediently at school, now isn't the time to be heros!
                    The expression of the soldier became more and more menacing, without thinking, I barged in and grabbed the boy's arm: “Enough!Joseph Giarde, shut up!”
                    Everyone was surprised by my appearance, before they realise, I dragged the boys back on to the sidewalk, fortunately the Germans didn't do anything else, and drove proudly away.
                    "Sir, why did you stop us?" Jacque Paige who was more impulsive, was the first to express his discontent towards me, the others also glared at me, "we shouldn't be polite to these invaders, we should expel them from France!"
                    "Yes! Yes! We can't let those German pigs think we are cowards!" Immediately there were agitated voices of agreement.
                    I was about to rage: "Of course, you are warriors brave enough to fight with your bare hands against machine guns! But when the bullet pierces through your chest, when your mothers burst out crying over your corpses, you will finally know the price of some verbal vent!"
                    "We... are not afraid of death!" there was a streak of regret on the boy's face, yet he was still angered.


                    20楼2015-06-13 18:30
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                      真棒,我也想过,打算大学来


                      来自Android客户端21楼2015-08-23 22:05
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                        加油


                        来自Android客户端22楼2015-11-17 12:59
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